August 2023 Newsletter

Jokes and Reflections

Kids Thoughts

My six-year-old son, David, and his grandmother were taking a walk and detoured through the local graveyard.

Stopping to read the tombstones, grandma explained that the first date was the day the person was born and the second date was the day the person died.

“Why do some tombstones only have one date?” David asked.

“Because those people haven’t died yet,” his grandmother explained.That night, David couldn’t stop talking about the excursion. ‘Mom,” he said with wide eyes, “some of the people buried there aren’t even dead yet!”

No Lie

Once, in the 1820’s, a little boy called Sam was playing in the yard behind his house.  During his pretend fighting game, he knocked over the outhouse.  Now Sam was upset and worried that he would get into trouble so he ran into the woods and didn’t come out until after got dark.  When he arrived back home, his pappy was waiting for him.  He asked suspiciously, “Son, did you knock over the outhouse this afternoon?”

“No, pappy,” Sam lied.

“Well, let me tell you a story,” said the father. “Once, not that long ago, Mr Lincoln received a shiny new axe from his father.  Excited, he tried it out on a tree, swiftly cutting it down.  But as he looked at the tree, with dismay he realized it was his mother’s favorite cherry tree,” his pappy paused.” just like you, he ran into the woods.  When he returned, his pappy asked, ‘Abraham, did you cut down the cherry tree?’  Abraham answered with, ‘Father, I cannot tell a lie.  I did indeed chop down the tree.’  Then his father said, ‘Well, since you were honest with me, you are spared from punishment.  I hope you have learned your lesson, though.’  So,” the Sam’s father asked again,” did you knock down the outhouse?”

“Pappy, I cannot tell a lie anymore.” said the little boy.  “I did indeed knock down the outhouse.”

Then his pappy spanked Sam boy red, white, and blue.  The boy whimpered, “Pappy, I told you the truth!  Why did you spank me?”Pappy answered, “That’s because Abraham Lincoln’s father wasn’t in the tree when he chopped it down!”

No Judgement

A few years ago, a 24-year-old boy seeing out from the train’s window shouted… “Dad, look the trees are going behind us!”

As his dad smiled, a young couple sitting nearby, looked at the 24-year-old’s childish behavior with pity, when suddenly he again exclaimed… “Dad, look the clouds are running with us!”

The couple couldn’t resist and said to the old man.  “Why don’t you take your son to see a good doctor?”

The old man smiled and said… “I did and we are just coming from the hospital, my son was blind from birth, and he just got his eyes today.”

Remember: Don’t judge people before you truly know them. The truth might surprise you.